My Fortress of Solitude

If ever you feel

Like you're lost

You can count on

Me

I'll find your way

When the

Lights go out, in the

Universe

I'll be next to you,

I'll be next to you

And I'll

Surrender myself... to

You

I'll love you forever, I'll

Like you for always

For always,

Together we'll be

I'll love you

Forever, I'll like you for

Always

For always, together we'll

Be

If ever you're too sick to

Walk

I'd carry you, I'd take care

Of you

If ever you feel scared

And alone, I'd hold you

I'd just

Hold you

When the lights go

Out, in the universe

I'll be next

To you, I'll be next to you

And

I'll surrender myself... to

You

I'll love you forever, I'll

Like you for always

For always,

Together we'll be

I'll love you

Forever, I'll like you for

Always

For always, together we'll

Be

And when you cold, just like

You do

I'll give you my coat,

Cause I'm here for you

And as we

Grow old, I promise to

Love you

With every breath that is

True

When the lights go out, in

The universe

I'll be next to you,

I'll be next to you

And I'll

Surrender myself... to

You

I'll love you forever, I'll

Like you for always

For always,

Together we'll be

I'll love you

Forever, I'll like you for

Always

For always, together we'll

Be

“PA – PEYSBUK NGA!!!!” [Read this very funny!]


“PA – PEYSBUK NGA!!!!”. Linya ng estudyante na uubusin ang baon para makapagrent sa isang internet shop. Linya ng isang empleyado pagkadating niya sa opisina at naabutang ginagamit ng katrabaho ang office computer. Linya ng kapitbahay na gustong maki gamit ng internet sa kadahilanang hindi siya nakapagbayad ng bill. At kung sino man ang sinasabihan nila, malamang ang isasagot nito ay.. “teka, log out ko lang..”. Nagpe-facebook din pala.

Facebook. Ang social networking site na lumamon sa myspace at friendster. Ito rin ang pilit kinakaibigan ng ilan pang aspiring forms of social media. Pansinin mo, yung mga bagong kumakaribal sa Facebook e may feature kung saan magrereflect din sa FB account mo ang kung ano mang post mo, gamit ang site nila. Gaya nalang ng twitter, tumblr at kung ano ano pa. Parang pelikula. Pag pinalabas ito sa sinehan sa guadamall (ang mabagsik na mall sa guadalupe), ipapalabas din ito sa sinehan ng MOA. Nagkakaiba nga lang sa level ng urine aroma at dami ng surot sa upuan.

Sa sobrang popularidad nito ay pwede na itong iconsider na necessity. Iba na ngayon. Humans need food, water and facebook. Clothing? Ano ngayon kung nakahubad. At least. nakaporma ka naman sa bago mong profile picture. Pwede na ngang iconsider ang kasalukuyan bilang “The Facebook Era”. Ang panahon kung saan tangap na ang mga bading at tomboy (kaya ikaw, wag na magpanggap, ok na daw, di mo na kelangan mag gym kuno), kung saan mas mahal nang mga tao ang aso kesa sa kapwa nila tao (inday!! ibigay mo ung ulam mo kay brownie, mag skyflakes ka nalang!!!), kung saan lahat ay tumatakbo sa mga marathon, kung saan lahat ay may necklace na ang pendant ay isang mamahaling camera, kung saan papalitan na ng cobra at sting ang dumadaloy sa mga tubo ng NAWASA, kung saan lahat ng statement ay dapat magtapos sa isang uri ng emoticon (uy, tang ina mo, joke. (“,) ). Lahat ito ay bahagi na ng social norm. Lahat tangap na. Pero huwag. Uulitin ko. HUWAG NA HUWAG mong sasabihin, lalo na sa isang pampublikong lugar na. “Ay, wala akong Facebook eh..”. Patay ka dyan brad. Kiss of death yun. Baka bigla kang paskilan ng papel sa noo mo na may nakasulat na EEEWWWW!!!. Baka biglang magkaroon ng caste system sa pinas at lahat ng walang FB account ay mga untouchables. Pwede ring i-ekskomunikado ka ng simbahan katoliko at ipapakalat ito sa mga tweet ng arsobispo.

Kung stalker ka, di na kelangan ng paliwanag kung bakit adik na adik ka sa FB. Pero para sa masa. Ano bang meron dito?

Bukod sa green joke na ibinulong sayo nung tropa mong adik, pwede ka ding magshare ng pictures (aka pix),videos, notes at mga links mula sa iba pang sites. Makikita ito ng mga “friends” mo at pwede silang magkomento dito. Walang limit ang pagpo post. May sense man o wala. Healthy nga daw ito sabi nung mga sociologist. Exercising our rights to free speech daw ito. Pero lahat ba e post-worthy? O karamihan ay nagdadala lang ng badtrip.

Freedom of speech pala ha. Ito ang post ko tungkol sa mga post ng iba. Guilty tayo dito.

1. Iwasan ang pabigla – biglang pagpapalit ng relationship status. Lalo na kung mababaw lang ang dahilan tulad ng late reply sa text o hindi pag iloveyou sayo ang jowa mo kaninang alas tres (sarili nyong 3 o’clock habit). Dahil pag nagka-ayos kayo, at ibinalik mo sa dati ang status mo, ikaw din ang magmumukhang praning.

2. Walang masama kung purong tagalog ang shout out mo. Wag matakot na sabihan nang “uy makata”. Kesa naman panay nga ang english, sablay naman ang grammar at hindi kakikitaan ng sense ang sinabi. (iba ang you’re sa your).

3. Check in. Ang post kung saan sinasabi ang kasalukuyan mong lokasyon. Positibo. Pwedeng maging safety precaution. At least alam nila kung saan ka huling pumunta sakaling di ka mahagilap ng ilang araw. Negatibo. Easy prey ka sa mga serial killers o sa kaibigan na may galit sayo. (Ingat ka silvestre. hehehe)

4. May “about you” page ang FB. Dun mo isusulat ang mga hilig mo. Di mo na kelangan pang magpost ng magpost ng mga youtube videos nila Ozzy Osbourne, Metallica o Korn para ipagdiinan na rakista ka. Ikaw din, baka mahirapan kang panindigan. Lalo na pag tumugtog na ang paborito mong kanta ni Katy Perry. Napaindak at sing along si kumag.

5. Hindi kelangan magpost ng mga litrato o video nang iniembalsamo o bangkay na durog durog ang katawan at labas ang mga laman loob. Palit kaya kayo nung andun sa picture. Ako naman ang magpopost.

6. Magtira ng konting privacy para sa sarili. Hindi lahat ng bagay ay dapat ishare. Lalo na sa social media. Sarilinin mo nalang ang gusot sa pamilya o away mag asawa. Pribado na yon. Post ka ng post, tapos mababadtrip ka kung gagawing pulutan sa inuman ang kwento ng buhay mo.

7. Ok lang ipost ang mga bago mong gamit. Gaya ng mga gadget, damit o accessories. Natural lang maging proud ka lalo na kung pinaghirapan mo o importanteng tao ang nagbigay sayo nito. Di lang siguro tama na sabihing “hay nakakapagod na magshopping, andami ko kasi pinamili”.

8. Kung sakaling may nagpost ng malungkot o kaya’y tungkol sa isang masamang pangyayari sa kanila, wag mong i-like. Ano yun? Nagustuhan mo pa na sumemplang siya sa kanal.

9. Wag mong i-like ang sarili mong post. Kaya nga pinost mo in the first place. Mas malala kung ikaw din ang magcocomment. Parang loner ka naman nun.

10. Wag kang basta basta magpost ng nakakagagong comment, lalo na sa mga picture kung saan may mga taong di mo kilala. Halimbawa: “Pre, sino yang kasama mo sa pic? si Bella Flores?”. Huli mo na nalaman. Girlfriend pala niya yun.

11. Kung sakaling may nagpost ng matino at informative na mensahe. Magpasalamat. Huwag mag angas sabay comment nang “ay luma na yan, huli kana sa balita” o kaya “wala, kalokohan lang yan”. Wag kang magmagaling. Matalino kaba na parang si Rizal? E di pabaril ka sa Luneta.

12. Wag gamitin ang FB para magpakalat ng maling impormasyon at maghatid ng mass hysteria. Pero kung sino man ang napost na aabot dito ang radiation sa japan. Nagpapasalamat sayo ang manufacturer ng Betadine.

13. Wag sumali at i-like ang isang fan page kung puro kagaguhan lang ang ipopost mo sa wall nito. Halimbawa, nagpamember ka sa page ng isang seksing artista tapos mag cocomment ka lang ng “uy, sarap mo naman, parang mainit na lugaw sa malamig sa madaling araw”. Tapos magtataka, “hala.. bakit ako na banned?”.

14. Hindi lang ikaw ang may gustong manood ng sine. Wag kang mag post ng mga spoilers na maaaring ikabadtrip ng iba. “just watched Nardong Putik: Ang Pagbabalik Ni Totoy Burak, ganda ng ending, napatay nya ung kontra bida sa pamamagitan ng pagpukpok sa ulo ng isang palayok, pero sad dahil huli na nang malaman nya na tatay niya pala yun..”.

15. Di naman ata kelangan simulan ang post mo sa salitang “Damn!!” o kaya “Oh gosh” lalo na kung di naman malubha o kagulat gulat ang pangyayari. Halimbawa: “oh gosh, umuulan”. Taga saudi???

16. Wag matawa at kantyawan kung corny o masyadong romantiko ang isang post. Tandaan mo, magmamahal ka din. Lintik lang ang walang ganti. Dami kong kilalang ganyan.

17. Ok lang siguro ipost kung ano at kung saan ka kumakain. Iwasan lang yung pagpopost ng close up pictures nung pagkain mismo. Marami ang nagpapalipas ng gutom sa pamamagitan ng Facebook. Sino ka para inggitin sila. Parang yung feeling na, asa air-con bus ka, pauwi sa bahay at gutom tapos may kumag na kakain ng burger at fries. Langhap mo ang bawat kagat niya. Di maka tao. Dapat palitan ang pangalan niya. Gawing Lucifer.

18. Ok lang siguro ang mag post sa paraang Jejemon. Trip mo yun e. Wag mo nga lang asahan na seseryosohin ka kahit matino ang gusto mong sabihin. Expect mo rin na lahat ng comment sayo e magtatapos sa “jejejeje”.

19. Wag magimbita sa isang okasyon gamit ang shout out mo, tapos may ita-tag ka lang na piling tao. Bangag kaba? Makikita ng lahat ng “friends” mo na iilan lang ang gusto mo papuntahin sa nasabing okasyon.

20. Pwede ba?? HINDI PORKET ALL CAPS E GALIT ANG NAGPOST. BAKA LUMUBOG AT NASTUCK LANG ANG CAPS LOCK.

21. Sapat naman na siguro ang tatlong exclamation point para ipaalam sa bumabasa na puno ng emosyon ang post mo. Di mo kelangan punuin ng punctuations porket walang bayad ang extra characters tulad ng sa text messaging. Halimbawa. Pakyu ka!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. Mali yun. Dapat. Pakyu ka!!!

22. Iwasang magpost kung ikaw ay (a) lasing, (b) nasa impluwensya ng ipinagbabawal na gamot o (c) hindi tinirahan ng ulam. Walang gustong makabasa ng pag aamok mo na puno ng mali maling spelling. Kung sakaling nakakaramdam ng “FB rage”, magpahid ng menthol toothpaste sa mga palad, at itampal tampal sa mukha mo hanggang sa kumalma.

23. Oo, dapat sulitin ang unlimited surfing na maghapon mong binantayan para lang maregister. Pero di ibig sabihin nun na post lang ng post. Halimbawa, ang ilalagay mo sa shout out mo e tatlong magkakasunond na tuldok. Ano yun? Buti pa quote nalang. Time is gold.

24. Wag trigger happy sa “share” button. Hindi porket di nagappear sa profile page ang mabangis mong status message e kelangan mong tiktikin ang pagpindot. Antayin mo lang. Mamaya ilang beses na pala napost. Paulit ulit. Wag kang atat. Lalo na kung ang ipopost mo e “Patience is a virtue”.

25. Wag mong kakumpetensyahin ang youtube sa dami ng video na nakapost sa wall mo. OK lang siguro kung ishare mo ang isang nakakatawang clip kung saan may nag susurfing na pusa o kaya naman e makabuluhang excerpt ng isang documentary. Wag naman yung lahat ng mtv ng kantang marinig mo sa jeep o lahat ng episode ng wow mali.

26. Wag ipahamak ang sarili. Kung sakaling pwede naman palang acronym ang isang term e wag mo na itong buuhin sa iyong post. Loud out loud!!!!.

27. Hindi masamang makisali sa mga occasional drives o campaigns. Tulad ng paggamit ng picture ng nanay mo pag mother’s day o pag post ng mensahe tungkol sa cancer bilang status message mo. Hindi porket di ka nakisali e cool o mas sophisticated ka.

28. Kung may nagcomment o nagpost sa wall mo na di mo kilala ang pangalan pati na ang picture. I-open saglit ang profile. Wag mo agad replyan ng makamandag na “HU U?”. Malay mo, tropa mo pala yun. Binaliktad lang ang pangalan. O kaya naman e dinagdagan ng H. Mhayhumhi Pharhedez.

29. Kung magcocomment ka, halimbawa sa isang picture, iwasang gumamit ng paghahalintulad sa ibang tao lalo na kung kagaguhan lang ang sasabihin mo. Halimbawa, “baduy ng porma mo pre, parang bisaya lang” o kaya “mukha kang magsasaka”. Tandaan, di ka lamang o nakahihigit sa mga bisaya at magsasaka. Ikaw kaya, magpost ka ng video tungkol sa mga unggoy, tapos may magcomment, “ambobobo naman nila, parang ikaw”.

30. Wag kang magatubiling bumati sa mga post tungkol sa panganganak ng isang ina, pagpapakasal ng magsing irog o pagkatangap sa trabaho. Sa magulong mundo, hindi ba’t masarap ishare ang mga positibong pangyayari.

Code of ethics. Wala. Oo. Walang basagan ng trip.

Pero hindi ba mas maganda kung ginagamit mo to sa matinong paraan?

Pa-Peysbuk nga!!!



Source/Credits: Pa-Peysbuk nga!!!

ayiiiiiii ♥

Hi JR how are yah? Well I'm fine, i guess so. Lately things are not exactly what I wish for. Its like all the joy and happiness just vanished into thin air. Just like that. All that's left are  shallow empty little me. SAD!

Sometimes I wish, things are not that complicated. That is why I envy little kids running off, playing, laughing, because they don't have worries in life. HAKONAMATATA by the way. "It means no worries"

It all boils down  to the fact that, she made a great impact on me. I haven't been this happy  until she came into my life. I'm always alone. Loner, low self esteem, as in no social life at all. It's seems like pain has been my only friend. I'm really happy she came. I finally feel what is like to be happy. To be normal. Yes that's the word. NORMAL!

She don't have a clue, what it feels like to be next to her. It may sound funny or corny, but it feels like butterflies will burst through my stomach in every second that I was with her. I like being with her, and I wish I can be with her forever. But then it goes boom, failed gone, now you see me now you don't effect.

Do you know the first law of alchemy? Humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost. That is alchemy's first law of Equivalent Exchange. 

All things do come at a price, that there's an ebb and a flow, a cycle, that the pain we went through, did have a reward, and that anyone who's determined and perseveres, will get something of value in return, even if it's not what they expected. The pain I felt over the years did comes with a reward. And that is HER. Like a fairytale come true. Fairy God Mother came over and gave me a pair of shoes and a carriage made of squash.. oopppsss wrong page, I got confused on that part, wahahaha..

But this is something new in me. I'm not used to feel like this. I'm scared, really really scared. I'm scared that if I let myself be happy for one minute, the next thing i know is that my worlds going to come crashing down and I don't know if I'll be able to survive that... :[ 

sob sob sob :(

Maraming naglalaro sa isip ko. Maraming gumugulo sa isipan ko. Saan? Ano? Paano? Bakit? naging ganito ang lahat. Gayung wala naman ako ginawang masama. Wala rin ako ideya kung saan ako nagkamali. Pilit ko mang isa isahin ang mga pangyayari, Pilit ko man tahiin ang mga pira pirasong sandali na tayoy magkasama, di ko pa rin lubusang maintindihan ang lahat. Nahihirapan na ang isip at kalooban ko. Litong lito na ako. May mali ba talaga sa akin? o talagang praning lang ako.

Sana panaginip lamang ang lahat. Sana isa lamang ito bangungot na bukas pag gising ko ay ok na ang lahat, Kabaligtaran ito ng isang tagpo na kung saan sobrang saya ko, na ayoko na matapos ang mga sandaling iyon, Sana kung panaginip man iyon ay ayoko na magising, Yun pala sa kabila ng mga sayang iyon ay may kapalit pala lungkot. Lungkot na nagpapahirap sa kalooban ko. Sa bawat sandali kaw lang ang naiisip ko. Para na ako baliw. Nagsusumamo ako sayo, sanay kausapin mo na ako, pag usapan natin kung ano man ang kinakagalit mo sakin. Wala namang di nadadaan sa maayos na usapan. Haysssss, miss na miss na kita :( Mahal kita at alam mo yan :(

I miss you so much. I don't know what happened, why suddenly you gone cold. Are you mad at me again? What did I do? The idea of being with you always made me happy ... until I realized you were perfect for me...now it just makes me scared. You mean so much to me, that I'm scared to close my eyes and open them and see that you're not there. And I'm scared to leave them open to see you leaving me. I don't know why I'm so afraid to lose you when you aren't even mine. I'm afraid because you're the single-most, important being to ever grace my existence. I love you so much.. :(

One of the worst feelings in the world is loneliness. Sitting in the dark by yourself in the wee hours of the night gently crying. Nobody knows what's going on with you. How could anybody realize what's happening? Everybody you know is resting peacefully in their bed awaiting the new day tomorrow. But for you, there's no difference in the days. They pass monotonously. And before you know it, it's all gone.


It’s the loneliest feeling in the world - to find yourself standing up when everyone else is sitting down. To have everybody look at you and say what’s the matter with him?? I know what it feels like. Walking down an empty street, listening to the sound of your own footsteps. Shutters closed, blinds drawn, doors locked against you. And you aren’t sure whether you’re walking toward something, or if you’re just walking away

It’s like I realized that way down inside, I’ve always been lonely for something. But I don’t know what for. It’s like everybody in the world wants something only they never really know exactly what it is - they just keep finding out what it’s not. You know how, when you turn off the TV or you come out of some concert, and everything just feels…empty? Like you thought that would be what you wanted, and then it wasn’t

My biggest fear is that I will become too comfortable with the idea of being lonely for the rest of my life.

When I’m not there… do you think of me? When you're sad and something's bothering you… do you wish I was there to help comfort you? When you've had a long hard day... do you smile knowing that soon you'll be seeing me, and everything will seem better, even if it's just for a moment? When you lay down at night... do you look back and cherish the new memories you've made with me? And when you get up in the morning, does everything inside of you smile, knowing that this will be another day that we'll be together? Because that's how I think of you..

miss you :(

The dictionary defines grief as keen mental suffering or distress over affliction or loss; sharp sorrow; painful regret. But in life, strict definitions rarely apply. In life, grief can look like a lot of things that bear little resemblance to sharp sorrow.

There are five stages of grief. They look different on all of us, but there are always five.
1. Denial.
2. Anger.
3. Bargaining.
4. Depression.
5. Acceptance.

According to Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, when we're dying or have suffered a catastrophic loss, we all move through five distinct stages of grief. We go into denial because the loss is so unthinkable we can’t imagine it’s true. We become angry with everyone, angry with survivors, angry with ourselves. Then we bargain. We beg. We plead. We offer everything we have, we offer our souls in exchange for just one more day. When the bargaining has failed and the anger is too hard to maintain, we fall into depression, despair, until finally we have to accept that we’ve done everything we can. We let go. We let go and move into acceptance.

Grief may be a thing we all have in common, but it looks different on everyone. It isn’t just death we have to grieve. It’s life. It’s loss. It’s change. And when we wonder why it has to suck so much sometimes, has to hurt so bad. The thing we gotta try to remember is that it can turn on a dime. That’s how you stay alive. When it hurts so much you can’t breathe, that’s how you survive. By remembering that one day, somehow, impossibly, you won’t feel this way. It won’t hurt this much. Grief comes in its own time for everyone, in its own way. The really crappy thing, the very worst part of grief is that you can’t control it. The best we can do is try to let ourselves feel it when it comes. And let it go when we can. The very worst part is that the minute you think you’re past it, it starts all over again. And always, every time, it takes your breath away.

Please pray for the soul of my Ninang/Tita Fe. She past away last Sunday. I know wherever she is right now, she is happy and now with the Lord above. I can't say goodbye to a person who became a big impact to our family, not just to our family but for the Andal-Cantre clan as a whole. Thank you for all you did for us. Farewell Tita Fe. We will miss you. 

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted” (Matthew 5:4)